satire

Wow! I Took a Two-Hour Long Nap and Trump’s STILL President?

When I went to take a nap this afternoon, I fully expected two things to happen by the time I woke up. My first expectation was that I would wake up feeling refreshed, revived, relaxed, basically like a million bucks. My second expectation? I fully believed that by the time I woke up from sleeping that somehow in those two hours when I was unconscious that the universe would have corrected itself, and Donald Trump would no longer be my president.

Listen, I know what you’re thinking. Wait, he’s still President? I thought we impeached that bozo last month! 

And it’s true! Mr. Trump is like one solid urine-related scandal away from impeachment. Which is why I thought taking a two hour long nap would be enough time for him to stop being President. 

When I woke up, I checked my phone. I looked at the news, certain that in the duration of my afternoon nap that something would have happened, the final straw, if you will, and Trump would once again just be another angry orange man that does not have control over my reproductive rights or if my international friends are allowed to return back to the country when they visit their families over winter break.

I was shocked to find that the news was the same as always. CNN had an article about how we might be entering a third world war. MSNBC had a little ditty about how there is substantial political theory to support the idea that in 30 years’ time our world could look a lot like The Handmaid’s Tale, and so on.

I’m planning on taking a three hour nap next time to see if that changes anything. Maybe that’ll do it?

 

 

 

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